Saturday, December 21, 2024

The Good, The Bad and—wait—Who? 2023 legislator rankings

With the 2023 legislative session but a dusty memory on the horizon, we asked you to help us figure out who was the best, the worst and the most under-the-radar legislators. This year, the survey was filled out more than 300 times… maybe by as many as 300 people! So, we know it’s super duper accurate! Zero margin of error!

But to be clear, in the age of missing internet sarcasm, this is a for-fun survey and should be treated as such. Because we wanted as wide and as anonymous of input as possible, we didn’t put anything up to stop people from trying to stuff the ballot box, didn’t have signature verification online and didn’t have a ballot curing process.

These are FAKE pictures generated with Photoshop’s generative fill software, just in case you were wondering how three legislators could ride two horses.

At the very least, though, it looks like the formatting problems with the poll (some users reported seeing a 1-3 scale rather than a 1-5 scale on their mobile devices) didn’t have a significant impact on the results, as only four total respondents stayed within the 1-3 ranking for every legislator. That said, 68 respondents had no five-star rankings to give, which is fair given everything.

Alright! Onto the results! Hope you might find them funny!

The Good

Sen. Bill Wielechowski does his best impersonation of The Man With No Name in this AI-generated illustration.

For the first time since we started conducting this survey, Dillingham independent Rep. Bryce Edgmon didn’t finish first (twelfth this time). Instead, that nod goes to Anchorage Democratic Sen. Bill Wielechowski, who found himself at the center of the Senate’s 17-member bipartisan supermajority as the chair of the powerful Senate Rules Committee. His 2023 legislative session featured renewed work on one of his key priorities: Taxing oil companies more. His legislation got plenty of hearings and a vicious response from the industry, which probably tells you he’s onto something.

As the No. 1 overall legislator with an overall score of 3.89, Wielechowski finished first in intelligence with an average rating of 4.22, fourth in effectiveness at 3.63 and tied for eight in ethics with 3.81.

Runners-up (overall score): Sen. Jesse Kiehl (3.83), Rep. Andy Josephson (3.82), Sen. Löki Tobin (3.73), Sen. Bert Stedman (3.69), Sen. Forrest Dunbar (3.67), Sen. Matt Claman (3.64), Rep. Genevieve Mina (3.62), Sen. Gary Stevens (3.62), Rep. Calvin Schrage (3.61)

The Bad

Rep. Jamie Allard as a cowboy waiting for high noon in a deserted dusty western town in this AI-generated illustration.

After several years, Rep. David Eastman has finally been dethroned as the worst Alaska legislator. That honor goes to Eagle River Republican Rep. Jamie Allard, who transitioned from Anchorage Assembly to the Alaska Legislature about how you’d expect it to go. With a high-profile platform as the chair of the House Education Committee, Allard garnered plenty of attention as not only the biggest roadblock to a permanent increase in education funding but also as one of the biggest and loudest cheerleaders of the governor’s odious “don’t say gay” bill that was masquerading as “parental rights” legislation.

Allard has an overall score of 1.33 and finished last in intelligence by a large margin with 1.39. She also got plenty of chatter during this session over her treatment of teachers, school district officials and labor representatives, which apparently included shouting matches and kicking people out of hearings, followed up by self-serving accounts after the fact.

Eastman’s still nipping at Allard’s heels as the lone legislator without a caucus, beating Allard out for the lowest scores in ethics and effectiveness.

Runners-up: Rep. David Eastman (1.54), Sen. Mike Shower (1.56), Rep. Tom Mckay (1.7), Rep. Sarah Vance (1.7), Rep. Kevin McCabe (1.74), Sen. Shelley Hughes (1.76), Rep. Ben Carpenter (2.02), Sen. Robert Myers (2.14), Rep. Mike Prax (2.28), Rep. Dan Saddler (2.22)

And, wait, Who?

Rep. Stanley Wright as a cowboy standing on the side of a dusty western street in this AI-generated illustration.

Anchorage Republican Rep. Stanley Wright had a largely quiet first term, at least when it comes to the wacky drama that grabs headlines and keeps us bloggers busy. Instead, the East Anchorage freshman carried several good and worthwhile bills, including legislation to limit access to old marijuana convictions for conduct that’s no longer a crime—and fighting off a ghoulish attempt to charge people for the privilege—as well as legislation cracking down on predatory payday loans.

Landing as the No. 38 legislator, Wright was above average when it came to ethics.

Runners-up: Anchorage Republican Sen. James Kaufman, Anchorage Republican Rep. Julie Coulombe, Fairbanks Rep. Frank Tomaszewski, Fairbanks Rep. Will Stapp, and Soldotna Sen. Jesse Bjorkman.

The most intelligent

Sen. Bill Wielechowski looks ready to give some sage advice on the trail in this AI-generated illustration.

Anchorage Sen. Bill Wielechowski topped the intelligence rankings with a 4.22.

Runners-up: Rep. Andy Josephson (4.14), Sen. Jesse Kiehl (4.02), Sen. Bert Stedman (3.98), Sen. Bryce Edgmon (3.93), Sen. Löki Tobin (3.92), Sen. Matt Claman (3.89)

The most ethical

Rep. Andy Josephson looks real heroic and spry in this AI-generated illustration.

Anchorage Rep. Andy Josephson topped the ethics chart with a 3.96.

Runners-up: Sen. Jesse Kiehl (3.93), Rep. Genevieve Mina (3.88), Sen. Elvi Gray-Jackson (3.85), Sen. Löki Tobin (3.83), Rep. Maxine Dibert (3.82), Rep. Andrew Gray (3.82)

The most effective

The 2023 legislative session ended in yet another conclusion where we saw Sen. Bert Stedman steer things to a close. He leads the pack in effectiveness by a fair margin at 3.98.

Runners-up: Sen. Lyman Hoffman (3.78), Sen. Gary Stevens (3.66), Sen. Bill Wielechowski (3.63), Rep. Bryce Edgmon (3.62), Sen. Jesse Kiehl (3.56), Sen. Cathy Giessel (3.55)

The least intelligent

The kind of Western Rep. Jamie Allard appears in apparently has cars, according to this AI-generated illustration.

Rep. Jamie Allard clocked in the back of the pack by a large margin at 1.39.

Runners-up: Rep. Sarah Vance (1.7), Sen. Mike Shower (1.75), Rep. Tom McKay (1.75), Rep. Kevin McCabe (1.83), Sen. Shelley Hughes (1.94), Rep. Mike Prax (2.16)

The least ethical

A grubby little Rep. David Eastman hangs out with an unusually small body in this AI-generated illustration.

Rep. David Eastman dodged disqualification on a technicality, keeping his seat in the Alaska Legislature for another term so he could then wonder whether the death of an abused child is a “benefit to society.” He scored a 1.28 on ethics.

Runners-up: Rep. Jamie Allard (1.34), Sen. Mike Shower (1.57), Rep. Kevin McCabe (1.64), Rep. Tom McKay (1.70), Rep. Sarah Vance (1.71), Sen. Shelley Hughes (1.83)

The least effective

Rep. David Eastman reaches through the grass to hold up what an AI-generated illustration thinks is a wanted poster.

Rep. David Eastman may not have seen his legislation fail spectacularly on the House floor this year. Still, it is pretty hard to be effective when no one wants to play with you (except, of course, for Rep. Sarah Vance, who gifted him a seat on the House Judiciary Committee). The caucus-less legislator scored a 1.17 in effectiveness.

Runners-up: Rep. Jamie Allard (1.26), Sen. Mike Shower (1.37), Sen. Shelley Hughes (1.5), Rep. Tom McKay (1.64), Rep Sarah Vance (1.7), Rep. Kevin McCabe (1.74)

The full rankings

LegislatorAvg. RatingIntelligenceEthicsEffectiveness
Sen. Bill Wielechowski3.894.223.813.63
Sen. Jesse Kiehl3.834.023.933.56
Rep. Andy Josephson3.824.143.963.36
Sen. Löki Tobin3.733.923.833.42
Sen. Bert Stedman3.693.983.123.98
Sen. Forrest Dunbar3.673.893.813.31
Sen. Matt Claman3.643.893.623.40
Rep. Genevieve Mina3.623.793.883.20
Sen. Gary Stevens3.623.773.423.66
Rep. Calvin Schrage3.613.733.683.41
Sen. Elvi Gray-Jackson3.583.603.853.29
Rep. Bryce Edgmon3.543.933.073.62
Sen. Cathy Giessel3.533.713.343.55
Rep. Andrew Gray3.523.703.823.04
Rep. Dan Ortiz3.523.713.613.23
Sen. Scott Kawasaki3.513.723.503.32
Rep. Jennie Armstrong3.513.783.603.16
Rep. Cliff Groh3.483.853.762.85
Rep. Sara Hannan3.473.623.693.09
Sen. Lyman Hoffman3.463.772.843.78
Rep. Ashley Carrick3.453.603.663.10
Rep. Rebecca Himschoot3.433.623.702.97
Rep. Maxine Dibert3.413.523.822.88
Rep. Alyse Galvin3.383.543.712.88
Rep. Andi Story3.373.433.792.90
Sen. Click Bishop3.373.443.243.43
Sen. Donny Olson3.353.633.003.43
Rep. Neal Foster3.333.563.043.39
Rep. CJ McCormick3.253.283.502.96
Rep. Zack Fields3.183.543.092.91
Rep. Justin Ruffridge3.173.413.093.02
Rep. Donna Mears3.163.383.562.55
Sen. Kelly Merrick3.073.153.033.02
Sen. Jesse Bjorkman3.053.203.132.83
Rep. Louise Stutes3.043.173.102.85
Rep. Jesse Sumner3.023.332.872.87
Rep. Josiah Patkotak2.893.132.642.90
Rep. Stanley Wright2.892.873.112.68
Rep. Will Stapp2.692.962.562.54
Rep. Julie Coulombe2.662.872.762.34
Sen. James Kaufman2.612.792.712.34
Sen. David Wilson2.562.822.422.44
Rep. Cathy Tilton2.392.462.312.41
Rep. Laddie Shaw2.342.512.352.16
Rep. DeLena Johnson2.342.382.332.31
Rep. George Rauscher2.312.322.482.13
Rep. Frank Tomaszewski2.302.392.422.08
Rep. Craig Johnson2.282.442.072.32
Rep. Mike Cronk2.232.172.272.25
Rep. Dan Saddler2.222.432.072.15
Rep. Mike Prax2.162.162.381.96
Sen. Robert Myers2.142.282.401.75
Rep. Ben Carpenter2.022.222.021.80
Sen. Shelley Hughes1.761.941.831.50
Rep. Kevin McCabe1.741.831.641.74
Rep. Sarah Vance1.701.701.711.70
Rep. Tom McKay1.701.751.701.64
Sen. Mike Shower1.561.751.571.37
Rep. David Eastman1.542.171.281.17
Rep. Jamie Allard1.331.391.341.26
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Matt Acuña Buxton is a long-time political reporter who has written for the Fairbanks Daily News-Miner and The Midnight Sun political blog. He also authors the daily politics newsletter, The Alaska Memo, and can frequently be found live-tweeting public meetings on Twitter.

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